I Am Going To Become Happy So I Can Tell You How It Feels
Zach Schwartz


you should do at least one of the things you said you were going to do
or else you will be fucked
i want to warn you “don’t be bleak” the way a charming sociopath would say “don’t be nervous!”
i need to tell you soon that not everything is going to be ok
and have created an event to do so on my iphone
and sent you an invitation to attend via email
but you haven’t confirmed yet
i need to tell you that talking about your problems doesn’t solve anything
and that seeing the world in a depressing way doesn’t have any reward
unless you do something with it


kanye west said that great art comes from great pain
my friend ziggy said that great pain happens to everyone
last night in his bedroom while playing guitar
when i said that some people seemed to induce pain
for the sake of making art


you can only be lost and confused for so long
before you are unhappy forever
i had a midlife crisis at 16
now i feel like an old man


i look at my stomach and it looks bigger than last year
this is a sign either of prosperity or gluttony
i drank two liters of tomato juice today
because i couldn’t help myself
right now i am practicing a card trick
while “coke boys 3” plays from my computer
and i get a text from you
telling me you will be right over